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A Little Note to the Light


Hearing your sobbing is the most difficult thing darling. Please forgive me. I know it is hard for us, especially for you. You love me and I am absolutely love you too.

Tonight, I try to sleep, but I can not. Questions are shouting to me in silence. There are many things that I do not understand. I can not ensure my self whether this decision, which I have taken, is the best path or not. I do not know. Although I do not understand it my self, I hope you will understand some day.

All that I want to be is being the best father for you and your brother. Both of you are my light. I am blind without you. You are my air. I can not breath without you. You are my soul. I am in hell without you. Sweetheart, I love you.

Do you remember the time we play with Lego-blocks? In this life, I live my life, because of my in-capabilities, in a way like you play your lego. I often do not really know what I want to build or how to build it. I just put a brick on top of another, without really understand what kind of thing will be resulted from it. I only use my ins-ting and imagination. I was imagining good things when I put a block of our life on top of another, but I do not really know whether it is good for us or not. I always hope that I am doing the good one, but if I am not, I beg your forgiveness.
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